Honestly...?

Ok.  So as a manager of persons, service staff, kitchen staff, and yes, even customers, I am compelled at times to just say the following:  sometimes the customer is a jerk.  There.  I said it.  

And ya know what...it doesn't make me feel any better.  Ugh.

I have worked in the same restaurant, the same dining room for over 13 years.  I have fostered, created, loved on, hugged, kissed, and cried with our customers.  These people are like family.  They know my child, I know theirs. As for my staff, for over a decade I have worked with some pretty amazing people who have become some of my closest friends.  We have seen each other through the shitty times and have celebrated the miraculous. While they may not be my blood, our relationships feel thicker than water. 

It's been, on the whole, a truly amazing time. 

The last two nights of service have tested every limit and happy, sunny feeling that exists in my 5'3" frame.  

Friday night.  Long time customers.  Frequent regulars of one of my servers.  She knows their particular quirks and challenges and that typically makes for a better experience for both sides of the service equation.  However, when they walk in with a major chip on their shoulders, refuse to acknowledge her presence at the table (she walks away, rightly), proceed to wave hysterically at her while she services the table next to them, and then change every dish on the menu to suit their asshole ways, only to decide, after all that, that the menu items are just fine (thank you, yes we know) the way they are, (this) all makes me want to fire the customer. 

Can I tell you, dear asshole customer, that you made her cry?  Do you even care how much your shitty ways affect not only her, but the rest of us?  If you did know, would it matter?  

For the record, the next time, you won't get "your" table or "your" server.  You may not even get "your" reservation.  You should be fired.  Period.

Saturday night.  Very first customers.  Two, seemingly sweet older (80-ish) ladies walk in.  No reservation.  That's ok, it's early.  But that doesn't give you the right to the following: demand this table, that table, it's cold, now I'm hot, I don't see anything that I'd eat, can I have something free...blah, blah, blah.  Just gross.  Why are you out to dinner if all you can do is complain?  Honestly, we really want to make you happy. It makes us happy to make you happy, but really?  Seriously? Please, next time, just don't come out.  Or go somewhere that won't give a shit, won't try to please you, maybe then you'll get the picture. 

Again, you're fired.  I'm done.  Your $82 dollars is just not worth our collective wasted effort, the tears, the frustration and the extra glass of wine at the end of the night that I have to give to your server just to talk her off the ledge.  

Thanks, but we're good.